10. We love balls, from meatballs to pepperoni balls to bocce balls are great

9. Us Italians have a beautiful language, from sentences like: “a gabago this pasta is-a-good” to “this does not mama da mia”

8. Peppino spaghetti, from the hit game pizza tower is actually a demon we summoned on accident after mispronouncing a pasta brand

7. Uhhhh I forgor

6. If you’re Italian waiter doesn’t say gabago, he is not to be trusted

5. The mafia is real, and we want your-a-money

4. Us Italians invented the feature of being able to switch sides mid game!

3. Pizza pasta, put it in a box, deliver it to my house and put it on my coc-

2. Nintendo has kidnapped Mario and Luigi from us… we miss them…

1. Italians are not real, Italy is not real, and I am not real