FNAF Community:

This community sucks mega assballs. I love the games but it seems like a lot of people in this community are just made of unemployed whiney douchebags. After expiencing little joy in many servers due to people saying "Im ragebaiting" just for saying I like a fangame that many people don't like or just have any opinion about anything.

I dunno I just think its kinda fucking stupid for someone to be suprised that I like certain fangame because FANGAMES ARE KINDA SIMILAR TO FNAF, OF COURSE IM GONNA FUCKING LIKE IT AND FIND IT FUN.
Gamejolt:
I don't have a paticular problem with gamejolt. I dont give a crap about the boost feature nor do I care about how bad the UI is because I can always use google to find a fangame.

Discord:

I'm not QUITTING quitting discord. I just left like every server I was in besides the 4 I found enjoyable. I'm trying to go on discord less because I am constantly losing focus because I keep wondering if anything cool is happening in the servers Im in which there usually isn't. I've decided just to stay in the servers my online friends are in. I am trying to be less online.

My Mental Health:

I've felt alone for a very long time. I'm almost 19 now and I still havent found any friends since middle school. I used to have friends, and then as time goes on I lose contact with people. After middle school, I kinda just gave up trying to make any conversation with anyone. I kinda felt like having no friends was cool because I can hang out with myself all day and nobody can hurt my feeling but I feel very alone now, I feel almost dead inside with a little bit of life left. I could try and just get a new group of friends but how would I even start talking to someone when it isn't work talk or "Can I order uh".

I feel scared to talk to people also. Sometimes my old classmates from highschool would dap me up or say hi to me while I'm at work and I dont know if they're trying to make fun of me or something because I don't even remember their names.

When I was actually attending highschool, I also felt very judged, they put me in a sped class and I'm not even disabled, I have a little "ADHD" if thats even real. They keep pestering me about my grades but other kids get Ds and they dont get talked to. Maybe I want a D or a C, I dont care about getting a A+ on a paper, it doesnt matter what I got as long as I had a diploma. I eventually just dropped out when I turned 18 because I was sick of listening to some guy teach math that I dont care about and be judged just for not paying attention.

All that school doesn't even matter, I have a job now, I don't like it very much nor do I enjoy minimum wage but it is money of some sort and most people who graduated high school make minimum wage anyway.

I feel judged by my family too. I cant really explain why, I just feel like I am. I feel like Im only invited to thanksgiving and christmas because I'm technically a family member and not because Im any good.

I dont even know if Im doing a good job at work or not either. I havent been fired yet but I feel very itimidated whenever a manager or boss walks by, even if they dont say anything or even look at me. Im not sure if Im still employed because they think I do a good job or they feel bad for me.

I cant even walk down the street without feeling itimidtated. Im scared to look at people walking my direction and Im unsure whether I should just walk behind someone from afar and get to my destination or walk around them very fast.

Project:

Since around 2023, I've been wanting to make a cartoon, around a year of brainstorming and notes, I thought it would be better if I start it off as a comic series because its kinda the same thing. I thought every cartoon needs a script and a storyboard, which basically is what a comic is. I would want each chapter to be around 20 minutes or 1 episode of a standard TV show. I would also want 3 chapters per book or "volume". I already have several episode/chapter ideas in mind and know the basics of who each character is and how they act. I feel like Im at the level where I feel confident drawing all the frames, backgrounds, characters and can write something that I would personally want to read or watch on TV.

I feel like drawing my characters and writing notes and the script is the only thing giving me any purpose in staying alive. I sure don't wanna work at a grocery store for the rest of my life nor can I afford to.

I'm glad I quit highschool. It gave me the opportunity to get a job to help pay my things. Even though I like to write and draw, I absolutly hated writing and art class. I dont like people telling me what I should draw, how I should draw, how I should write, what I should write. I feel like they were adding too many steps for something pretty simple. I just draw shapes and lines to make characters and backgrounds, and I come up with some characters, a plot and some jokes I can make based on that plot and make sure I dont make the characters boring AF.

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Conclusion: I hate this AI filled, toxic internet I decided to communicate in. I wont be on gamejolt much but if you know me on Discord, I respond to DMs. I need to start working on achieving my dream. Whats the point of life without a dream or a goal.