So the reason why I asked this question is because my friend Ryan was using those words that are possessing him. "He wasn't making fun of you" shit. And him being Allies with my enemy, makes me sad. Because he made fun of me for doing nothing, my autism, and the way I act. It's so fucking ridiculous that this school I am now, makes me depressed. I lost 2 FRIENDS. And I'm the part of the problem.

I fucking hate myself for being this foolish.

I wish I should forget all of this but I can't, I don't know how to ignore, this is all my fault. I hate myself for being like this. Why do I have to be this sensitive? Am I stupid? I know that I look like I'm calling myself [the r word because I reclaim it]

But it's true, my enemy made me like this.

And yes I know it's spring break.

And I'm glad that I can't be harmed in my house and room.

that means that I can check all of my notifications and draw in peace (if I want to )

But anyways. Choose wisely