I'm actually dying rn. I have no motivation for anything. I'm so tired. I have chapters of books I have to get out. I have school things. I dont have money for lunch anymore. I don't have putfits for said school things. I'm about to start even more testing. Friends are taking alot out of me. The year 12 students are making me depressed because they are leaving. Most of my friends worher hate me or are moving schools. I wanna have classes with my best friend but I feel like crap because I'm not a "good Christian" like she is and I don't "devote myself to god?" So she doesn't talk to me about things like that. I'm trying to be better and change myself for others but it's taking so much out of me. I'm not sure how much longer I can do this.