What even is the meaning of life?
Like seriously- what the fuck are we all doing here? All you do is wake up, pretend to be okay, smile when you feel like screaming, go to sleep- just to do it all over again. For what? To survive? To chase dreams that feel more and more out of reach the harder you try? It’s like everything you do ends up feeling pointless after a while.

You try to be kind, to push through, to stay strong—but no one fucking notices. No one really sees you. You’re just existing, floating, aching. And it’s exhausting.

Sometimes I sit here and wonder… is this all there is? Pain, confusion, pretending? And if it is then what the actual fuck is the point?

And the worst part? No one really talks about it. Everyone’s just walking around, playing this game like they’ve got it figured out!! smiling, laughing, acting like everything’s fine. But behind closed doors, we’re all falling the fuck apart. Drowning in our thoughts. Screaming into pillows. Staring at the ceiling like maybe it'll finally answer back.

I keep trying to find some kind of meaning in all this shit. Love, maybe. Success. Peace. But even that feels like a fucking illusion half the time. You get a glimpse of it, and then it slips right out of your hands. Like, how much more do I have to give just to feel okay?

It’s scary how numb you can get. How easy it is to stop caring. To just… stop. And then you feel guilty for even thinking like that- like you’re ungrateful or broken. But damn, maybe I am broken. Maybe we all are. Trying to find meaning in a world that chews you up and spits you out like you were never fucking here to begin with.

I don’t know. I just want to feel like I matter. Like there's a reason for all of this pain. Because if there isn't… then what the hell are we fighting so hard for?