So, because my game is, well, very personal but very blocky, let me explain it to you guys.

I came up with the idea sitting in class. When I first heard the theme at the keynote at my college, I was, to be honest, panicking that I wouldn’t be able to make it to class on time (it being the first class and all).

Anyways, I thought back to everything that has happened to me up to that point. Specifically, what happened to me in college. You see, I was kind of one of those people who thought I woul do amazingly in college, that it’s all about those hard classes. I even admonished anyone around me, graduating from highschool at the same time as me, for majoring in anything that wasn’t what I majored in or another Bachelors in Science degree. I was coddled by so many people, even though I wasn’t in the top ten, that I would succeed or that I was already a success, that upon meeting my roommates for the first time, that freshman first fall semester in 2012, it was humbling. Well, it was so humbling that the way I did things, in a sense, changed.

Out of all the things I regret having done in college thus far, dropping my Calculus I class my first semester tops the cake. My roommates (now suitemates) are math majors. Everyone on my floor is either double-majoring in math, is a math major, or is taking a minor in math. All of these people have super high GPA’s and do crazy things like make giant wooden catapults in their rooms or make dishes that can, with the help of the sun, burn things. I never did anything as cool in highschool besides making a couple crappy games for the Technology Student’s Association which I found out, were shoddily coded and used Gamemaker’s drag-and-drop features.

Basically, I felt behind.

Every semester, no matter how well I do in something, no matter how much time I put into my classes, I always had that lingering feeling that I couldn’t do anything. That I’m no one special.

Now, I wanted this game to express my frustrations and angst that I had that first year in college.

When I first thought of the game, I really imagined “A Day In My Mind”. I used a blocky at style for three reasons:

1. Thomas Was Alone inspired this game (Thank you Mike Bithell :D)

2. At my jam site, there were supposed to be critics and I wanted to essentially point a middle finger at them because being critical about a game’s art style really bugs me

3. I wanted the player to easily notice the differences between the player and the other figures in the game.

The player is essentially a part of the background, unimportant, and forgettable.

Like, the way I used the theme was literally the way I saw (and probably still see) people. I saw myself as important, a shadow of my former self, and an extra. I felt like quitting so many times (not to the point of suicide, I’m too optimistic for that crazy stuff :D), from quitting college to breaking up with my girlfriend because I felt like I don’t deserve her.

I wanted the player to feel like they had to use more effort to get things done. Though, that jump in the third screen is like that because in trying to make that one jump easier, if you mess up, the game’s over and you have to redo everything (which, thinking about it now, I could have fixed that by taking out all of those platfom pieces if you fell).

The part where the player is alone, after all of the jumping, was to reinforce how I felt being by myself as it felt like I was just in the way of everyone around me.

The part where the player has to try to jump over a wall that’s too high was actually replacing a previous scene idea where the player was at a workplace jumping from button to button but not at the same pace as everyone else. Due to time constraints I opted to make an easier room instead. When the player seems to have lost control of their character, in place of the camera they used

Now, the last part, with the house was supposed to represent the end of a work day, as a moment of respite where one recalls everything they’ve done. Me, being a little optimistic, decided to put done a house (a badly made house as to spite the critics at my jam site) saying that, at least I have people to return to.

The ending actually was not intentional. I wrote in my notebook that I wanted the ending to feel like the player was going to play again but I forgot that and the last words weren’t “Let’s try again.”, it was change. In a way, they both signified the possibility of something new happening but, yeah.

Music played a heavy role in the game. Though, it was the last thing I made and implemented, it made people cry at my site, or at least a few people almost did. The song is roughly 1 minute and 44 seconds long. A playthrough (plus falling off the platforms after reading “but I hestitate”) is roughly 1 minute and 50 seconds. The single song, which is unwritten, made in one go, and a bit weird at parts, represents a lot of emotions I felt during this time. I felt alone, frustrated, mad, jealous, scared, and quiet. I was so quiet about a lot of this that I tried to run away from it. I joined my University’s school paper and became their de facto independent game writer. I essentially lived in the office, trying to avoid going back to my room, to face my own insignificance.

Now, why did I finish this game, and why did I decide to make it for the jam?

1. This idea struck a chord in me, of course, so I kinda had to, or at least I felt like it.

2. I go to a Tech University and, having taken part in the global game jam, I was tired of how everyone was coming up with crazy technical ideas and weren’t thinking of some crazy “simple” piece.

3. Because I was working ENTIRELY by myself. I’ve never done that before, where I make everything including the music.

So, if you like the game, thanks.

If you don’t, no biggie, I think it could be better, too. Just, don’t keep those ideas to yourself. I’d like to know what people think, good or bad.

and to everyone who’s played the game, thank you.