I wanna be here, every single second youre still here in this world, with you, just so i can tell to not give up.

I know you must wonder every day whys so easy to live for some people, but so hard for you, and yes, its totally unfair, specially because i know this since my childhood, but theres something you need to see, and allow me to unblind you. First of all, yes you are unique. There hasnt ever been a story like yours, so i wanna see you getting through it to get to tell the tale of your glory, second, youre not your past or your future. No, none of those grades mean nothing about you, because one can be good at science but get a 0 at math, and this is completly fine. Its fine to get bad grades. You worry too much aboutt what's already gone, when the present is flying like the wind and youre like a gum stuck on the table. Lift your head up, my friend, because nows the time for happiness, why? Cuz people love you, people care about you, and if you dont see this in the care i try to have for you, than atleast see it in the ones around you, your friends, family, teachers, even when you think youre not worthy of love, who decides that? Theres nothing in this world that can make you not deserving of love, because despite whatever you did that brought you to that conclusion, you dont need to do anything to deserve love, just the fact youre alive makes you worthy, you know why? Because im sure your parents are proud to have a son/daughter, and not a dead baby, and to this fact, is for us to celebrate it with a party, a party where we'll show you just how much we really love you.

And i know, i know you wanna express your feelings so hard, but it seems like the words on the alphabet are not enough to put in paper the increasing ache deep in your soul, the internal screaming of your own demons, and its not easy, but even with this uncertainty, you gotta tell someone, because for how long have you been feeling this pain? Ill tell you, if you keep everything in this bottle, itll explode inside, and its worse than outside because you cant run from a monster that's also your conscience, so please, dont hesitate in telling and pouring your eyes out, because i prefer you to sleep, cry, do anything but harm yourself, and its your good i want, so please do what i say, or atleast try, because no cute image or meme ironizong the ache is gonna take it away, and to this infernal routine that always repeats, youll only find boredom thatll make everything worse, so dont avoid the therapist, dont avoid people, hug them, talk to them, and use your time with wisdom, because its always running, and to you, i dont want today or anytime else be your final tick, so please, find peace in meditation, self love with your loved ones, and health.

I wish for you only the best of things, and im Sorry if i wasnt able to change your mind.

Xoxo - Luca