I dont like being looked at. All of this is an illusion. I dont. Im tired. IM TIRED OF BEING FUCKING QUIET. I DO THINGS I THINK ARE OKAY BUT REALLY NOT. I DONT FEEL LOVED SO I DO STUFF THAT HURT ONE ANOTHER BECAUSE IF THEYVE HURT ME ONCE. THEN WHY DO I SIT THERE? I DONT FEEL LIKE I SHOULD HAVE EVEN BEEN ALIVE IN THE FIRST PLACE. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. IVE BEEN AT THE LOWEST PART AT MY LIFE IN WEEKS. IF IM NOT ANYTHING PERFECT THEN WHY DO I STILL BE HELD AS SOMEONE WHO SHOULD BE APPRECIATED. IM STUPID.

I SCREAM AT MYSELF AND CRY AT NIGHT JUST TO GO TO SLEEP AND THEN BE HAPPY THE NEXT DAY WHEN I REALLY WANNA IGNORE PEOPLE I DONT WANNA SO THIS LET ME LET ME OHR HELP ME