First and foremost I would like to apologize for the posts made yesterday regarding self harm. Self harm is never an answer no matter what. If you are having thoughts of self harm please seek help.

That being said, I would also like to apologize for the copious posts yesterday. As stated by @RubyRoseFan in the comment section of my last post yesterday I’ve been going through a lot these last few months and it’s gotten to me mentally. Without going too deep into it I’m likely going to be homeless soon. Yeah… so that alongside most of the things I listed off as to why I don’t want to do youtube anymore were enough for me to stop caring about how I present myself online. The straw that broke the camel’s back if you will.

I’m have purged 95% of the posts and only kept the things I agree with. As you may have noticed I said “I don’t want to do youtube anymore” in the paragraph above. That was not an attempt at an April Fools joke. I genuinely cannot continue to do youtube anymore. Beyond growing tired of playing FNaFb games and nothing else, it’s not really worth investing my free time into. I’m likely going to have to take up a second and third job just to stay in this city.

I’d like to take the time to expand upon my reasons as to why I’ve chosen to purge my youtube channel and deconstruct my comment listing the reasoning.

“My only real friend in the community, Ralsei left after the keyboard thing” Yeah. I don’t really have friends in the FNaFb community anymore. I used to be a part of a group but the group either fell apart or someone (me) pushed them away by acting like a brat. Ralsei was the only one who stuck around until I pushed him away. I held a grudge for him sharing that I broke my old keyboard to Ashton.

“90% of viewers and commenters left after the pausing for eve nerf thing” After both my controversies with EVE the growth of my channel all but stagnated. It took me around 2 months to achieve the numbers I was hitting around the MFCV playthrough. This isn’t a problem in and of itself however I wanted youtube to work. I wanted it to be a job. I can’t do that without hitting one thousand subscribers, which didn’t happen because I can’t keep my fucking mouth shut. The only times I ever got comments were when I did something controversial like when I played Remix 2 and fought people in the comment section. That’s not healthy for a channel to grow, and certainly not healthy for my standings in the community.

“The discord's probably turned away from me after turning how hard we killing stardust into a situation.” This is purely speculation on my end. I don’t know what goes on inside the FNaFb servers as I’m not in them, however I assumed that since Typo (Meltedbox) is a respected figure in the servers and I’m the braindead ogre that turned a joke into a situation where actual death threats were sent out that the wider community would naturally have a general disdain  for me, and everything that I do, say, and stand for. Not to mention that situation built on top of the other three situations I had with EVE which is widely considered to be the greatest FNaFb fangame. It’s not a good look and I feel as if it makes people be like “ew stardust speedster” or “oh stardust speedster, the lolcow let’s player”.

“I mean let's be real. My channel's a borderline slop channel, No offense to anyone who's games I've played but I add nothing to them.” I still stand by this statement. I add literally nothing to the games I play. No commentary, no face cam, no originality, no talent. Nothing. The only things I bring to the table are consistent uploads and showcasing games that otherwise likely wouldn’t be youtube due to the copious amounts of swearing in them. I can’t really change my content without investing money that I don’t have into something that’s not guaranteed to pay off. So I don’t see a point in continuing in its current state. Deleting the channel outright may have been a bit too drastic of a measure but it’s too late now.

I’m going to leave a poll on this asking if I should make ALL my previous videos public again. Including things like the Remix 2 let’s play I hid in fear that Ralsei would try to pull a FuntimeFoxyFan2007 and flag my channel for copyright infringement. 

I have also made DCC and Phantom Bonnie fight public again.

To those who continue to stick with me, even now, thank you. I'm not saying this is goodbye, but don't expect anything for a very long time

~ Stardust