Script:

Spy: Then we still have a problem.

Soldier: And a nun... nunnunununununu-

Scout: Big problem, I've killed plenty of spies, fuck you! Ow, no offense.

Spy: Pornography.

Spy: And nothing, nothing... will star your mother in pornography.

Scout: What are you? President of his pornography club?

Spy: That would be me. So listen up boy! You see what he's done to our cock!

Spy: And worst of all it could be any cocks...

Medic: Raus, Raus!

*random ass video*

Spy: He could be in this very room, he could be you! He could be me! He could even be- *splat sound effect*

Soldier: What? It was obvious, he's the Red Spy.

Soldier: Watch, he'll turn red any second now! Any second now...

Soldier: See red! No wait... that's lul

Heavy: So... we still got problem.

Soldier: Big problem. Alright who's ready to go find this spy...

Red Spy: Right behind you.

*gay sex happens*