I'm trying to work on a new video detailing what's going on with me. It will only be available in Russian (for some reason). But to give you a rough idea of the situation, I wrote this post

I have no reason to live anymore. It's that bad. My life had become a meaningless and painful existence. Loneliness, rejected feelings, loss of trust, broken heart, no best friend in my life..... I'm in real pain. And there's nothing I can do about it all. You may think you know what to say, how to be supportive. No. A lot of what you say doesn't make sense. You just don't know everything that has happened and everything I am experiencing. And so that you don't waste your time with useless comments and discomforting (for me) dialogs, comments are disabled. I have simply indicated that there are serious issues. And since I haven't done anything for all the time I've been living with this pain, there are reasons for that. I am not stupid, and I understand perfectly well what to do in such cases.

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I don't have the necessary resources, materials, and team to work on my projects. The plan was to work on them at a very slow pace. However, under the present circumstances, I will not be able to do even that.

My ideas are no longer important to me. I still want to realize them. And I am trying to do something, but now just to avoid going crazy, not to get the desired result. And I'm doing it with tremendous difficulty. There is no longer the same enthusiasm and feeling of being drawn to realize these ideas. What's more, I can't do anything at all now. I'm completely broken.

"Cause I'm broken, ain't nobody gonna fix me"

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The fate of my projects is in question.