I was born at the age of 0. After that, I couldn't open a bank account for 18 years. The students at gay sex school was always tryna touch my balls for a game. My doctor diagosed me with dementia, but I never remember having it. Life was so unfair to me, but then I learned how to turn my life around. Here's how I got here

4 AM

I scratch my balls

4:30 AM

I finish my ball scratching ritual

5 AM

I'm out of bed

6 AM

I secretly watch my Mom's have gender

7 AM

I eat my cat

7:01 AM

I realize I don't have a cat

7:02

I accidentally revealed to my my mom's that I watched them have gender in anger ment that I have ate the table

7:03 Am

I am beaten up

7:04

I buy me and my wife a house

8 AM

I cheat on my wife

9 AM

I am divorced

10 AM
I do 100 push ups 8 days every minute

11 AM
I blow up my grandma's house

12 AM

I become king of the world

12:10 AM

I realize it was a day dream

1 PM

I made my EX die of Ligma

2 PM

I get arrested

3 PM

I escape

4 PM

I take over the world

5 PM

I buy a dog

6 PM

I pee over the protesters

7 PM

I have my fart ritual session

8 PM

I sleep for 24 Hours

Being like me takes many years of grinding an workout hours. I don't pay taxes to save money. I also eat for 2 minutes a day.

9 PM

I eat the corpse of my grandma

9:10 PM

I throw the remaining bones at Feminists for laughs

9:11 PM

I blow up 2 to-



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