If I'm honest here.... I feel like I don't deserve anything... or any one...
I just feel like I'm an annoying, pathetic, and just a burden as a person... I feel like I don't deserve any of my friends... or anyone... really... it's mostly because I think like this a lot... almost every night really... I think about that tbh... I don't know why... i just have been.. for awhile I guess.... it's.. fine I guess, I'll be fine I always am, just.. I don't know why the urge to do... yk what is getting stronger along with my mood swings and thoughts... of the same thing to do yk what.. I just... don't know anymore... maybe because... I'm never gonna get to be anything I want to be in life... (aka a femboy and all that... I won't say why.. it's personal...) I... don't know what to do with my life at this rate..... I feel like I don't deserve anyone... any friends... or anything like that.... but I'm glad I have friends really... even though my thoughts and mind tells me other wise... yall are... great friends (mostly the ones I talk to a lot and the ones who help me with my depression and all that.) so.. I don't know what to do..... I'm.. sorry about this huge and long vent post... I'm just... really.. not sure how I am atm... but.. just so you know, I know I'm getting these thoughts of to do smth... and the urges are there.. just know, I don't plan to kill myself ever.... or I don't want to at all... I'll be here... but to relax and remove SOME stress, I don't think DeltaReCreation is gonna be a thing atm till I can figure this stuff out with my own thoughts and all that, just.. whenever I'm also asleep I hear randomly voices and feel like a million eyes or smth are watching me yeah.. so like, don't worry about this post THAT much, I'll be perfectly fine. I got yall to help me, even though yeah I can't really trust people on the internet (due to.. well people lying about their age and all that.) but.. I trust yall.. I really do. (While typing this my hand is killing me) so, hope yall have a good day. Besides I'll be fine within a few minutes.. :3c anyways yeah imma stop yapping now
