Honestly I really don't get it, these days. I don't know what's going on, but matter what happens, I always feel anxious. This started since, like this year where pressure began to pile up... And anxiety just peaked. I'm trying to find my way around these things, but even in the summer holiday I can just feel it... There's suffering coming soon for me. Like next year I've got mock exams, pretty stressed about that, this last year I stressed about most stuff and still ended up completely screwing up my subjects 😭 except for a few I actually did decent in-

Also whenever I do something wrong... Damn I feel so so bad like... I'm still holding onto something I said at DTI that I can't let go. Sometimes I just need space, though. Like irl I'm an introvert trying to be an extrovert for introverted reasons (unrelated). People irl don't help and haven't ever really helped with my stresses... But you lot, I love you guys and u always help me out. So thanks.

And if that's not bad enough, when I'm actually at school the blitz starts. As in, people just don't like me!! Everyone either is a fake friend/barely knows me, or hates me to the core/just makes fun of me. My confidence is pretty crap... And yea I get bullied. I don't wanna have this anymore though. And I won't. It makes me angry. It makes me want to hurt people. But hurting people is bad. Sometimes, I just can't control myself.

Also, I try really hard to help others... And it goes in vain, like the most I get is a thank you, not even any of their friendship really.