disclaimers - no, i didnt use ai. this is genuine. this truly comes from my heart. please appreciate this and notice my writing patterns in the text. - im sorry if anythings wrong. i reread and checked the text 4 times

i get constantly stressed for genuinely no reason since my life is rainbows and skateboarding puppies

and i have many ways of relieving that stress

them being common things (biting my nails, plucking out eyelashes, crying over anything, being rude to people, and things im not gonna mention)

so yeah.

i do care about people. im so sorry for the misunderstanding. but still i am quite rude and i do not think twice before speaking.

im so sorry.

i know im victimizing myself. i know i romanticize things i shouldnt. i know im pretty much an attention seeker and a hypocrite. im stupid, i know im stupid. im an asshole. im a burden, i depend in an exaggerated level on people.

i deeply, sincerely apologize to ANYONE out there i couldve hurt. im not aware of who i hurt, but im pretty sure theres a bunch. im so sorry. knowing i certainly ruined someones day keeps me up at night.

im so sorry to all my friends, all my haters, all the people that has encountered me only once, all the people i will eventually get to know. im so sorry for being like this.

i feel like yall are gonna take this as a "i have made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgement", which i understand since im usually unserious and stuff. you can make fun of me. you can hate me. thats completely valid. #accepttheblock. blocking me is MORE than acceptable; im not just a disgusting person. im an aggressive person. a harsh person. a person you would not want to talk about your feelings with. unfollow me if you want. unfriend me if you want. i know what i just said is obvious, but i want to let everyone know that im not whiny about that specifically.

and i repeat: im so sorry. no apologies could heal all the damage ive done. however i do want to apologize. i dont want to be a dipshit. i want to apologize. because im sorry. genuinely, so, so sorry.

i first joined this site to post my art and support other creators. i was so happy. but everything lately has been falling apart. gamejolt has corrupted me, and im pretty sure there is no turning back. im willling to change, but its so, so difficult, as you couldve guessed.

ive slowly become a rude, disgusting person. and not in the "freak weirdo aesthetic vibe" way. its something im not proud about. i dont have a "fake smile", i have fake respect. dude, im a kid. im a spoiled brat, actually. im allowed to yell at my parents. im spoiled every day. i have a loving family and loving friends. my life is wonderful, yet im greedy and i want more. i want to take out my (hormonal?) stress on anyone i can. unless youre pure of heart, youve definitely found ragebaiting fun at least once. its almost instinctive sometimes. well, thing is, i obey to the intrusive thoughts. im not used to thinking twice.

and even though (or "since"?) im pretty good at expressing hate, i suck at showing love and affection. i deeply apologize to my boyfriend. im ungrateful, greedy, and i dont think of ways to help him when HE is feeling down, while he always comforts me when im feeling down. its all falling apart, and its entirely my fault. he has always been sweet, considerate, and loving with me. and how was i with him? obnoxious. just because he was the one to declare to me it doesnt mean i can act the way i want, and im realizing just now: 7 months later. im sorry.

so again, im so sorry.

so, so sorry.

☺