It’s now been 1 year and 1 day since the release of the demo of “Vanessa”. In that time the game has accumulated just under 150 downloads from both itch.io and Gamejolt combined and has had at least one playthrough video being made of it. I’m really grateful for all the attention it has gotten and especially for the universally positive feedback from people leaving comments or even talking privately with me about it. The game was always going to be a bit of an acquired taste – a slow burn point-and-click adventure game that’s heavy on dialogue and atmosphere over more direct horror is always going to be a tough sell for any casual audience, not to mention the FNAF fangame crowd which has certain expectations of how one of those games is supposed to look like. I’m glad to see that despite all that there are still people appreciating it.
Unfortunately, despite all the positive reception, I’ve not had the motivation to make much progress on the development of the full game. One of the main reasons for this has of course been real life obligations – over the course of last year I took part in multiple video/film productions, graduated film school, joined an online volunteer art studio and worked on a bunch of other art (including the cover of the first issue of the “SOUP!” charity furry fanzine in support for Care for Gaza, check it out if you want to see some cool furry art and support a good cause). A lot of sleepless nights were spent working on each of these projects. Even if they weren’t a factor however, my struggles with mental health and general tendency to procrastinate when I don’t have a solid deadline would’ve ensured the same situation occurring regardless. I’ve always had difficulty maintaining a good pace when working on art and a project on this scale is especially daunting. I’ve also always been way too comfortable with that fact about myself. It’s about time something changes.
Starting from now, development on “Vanessa” resumes in full force. I will try to work on it as often as I can and to keep me motivated I will start posting development blog posts about my progress. You can consider this my first such post. Given the story-heavy nature of the game I’ll probably not be able to talk much in detail regarding certain aspects of the game development process, so I also plan on using this dev diary to talk about my broader philosophy in designing this game, my approach to game development and art making in general and whatever else I think of that would be interesting to talk about. I don’t expect these blog posts to be particularly popular even within the very, very modest following of my game, but that’s fine. Their primary goal is to motivate me to work on the game so I have something to talk about whenever it’s time for me to write a new one. I plan to have a new post up every other week during the weekend.
Of course, there’s still a lot of work to be done and I don’t expect my motivation to magically spike because I’ve written a few hundred words promising myself that it will. Breaking bad habits is hard and this particular one has been part of me for a long time. What’s also been part of me for a long time though is this game. Over the course of its development it’s become very important to me personally and I don’t plan on giving up on it anytime soon. It’s time to see it through to the end.
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