I feel like I have ADHD but I don't wanna tell my parents cuz they'll just say that I'm getting distracted bc of my phone or smth like I have other symptoms too you know but on the other hand if they will take it more seriously then they'll make me go to a psychiatrist and I hate talking to people especially adults and even more especially strangers like I just hate going to public and even if so then I'm insecure the way I walk cuz I walk wrong and stuff and I hate talking to people cuz I keep changing topics and I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable I literally regret every single word I say later on and I'll probably delete this post later or smth idk it's just so stupid I feel so embarrassed of myself I'm writing this here so my online brother won't see it I wanna tell him all that so much but we haven't talked in a couple of days cuz I hate talking and it's not his fault or anyones fault it's mine I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable and I don't want to manipulate anyone but I keep feeling like I do even if I don't want to I feel like a bad person because of all this idk if I'll even post this idk don't say anything in the comments I don't want support cuz I feel bad that people care abt me or that they make themselves pretend that they care I don't care about anything I just want to lay in my bad and do literally nothing there's something wrong with my emotions I don't feel what I should feel I am so unsensitive when there's something big but sensitive when it's literally so small idk I feel like I am toxic I'm not even putting this all in nice sentences cuz I just want to let it out I know I can make this look better cuz I'm good at English but I don't care but I should care cuz I'm writing like crazy I feel like I'm paranoid I am paranoid I think I am kinda burnt out but apparently that's also a symptom for ADHD I tried to tell my bestie that I feel like I'm ADHD but she said that I don't look ADHD I asked her what she meant she explained that I don't act ADHD you aren't my guardian angel you don't know what's going on inside my head I always daydream and make fake scenarios every second of every day why is this so long I am so boring and so toxic I make people feel bad I swear I don't want to I make ppl uncomfortable I don't want to talk to anyone but this just hurts people that like me for some reason please don't comment I just need to let it out without it making any difference in the way people closer to me act towards me I don't want problems