the character I have as my pfp is, well... sonic. part of the sonic oddites and in an fnf mod/song called Post mortem, I feel a strong connection to this character and others for a specific reason.

post mortem definition
Medical Context: It relates to examinations conducted after death, often referred to as an autopsy.

• Informal Usage: It can also mean an analysis or review of an event after it has concluded, such as a meeting to discuss the outcomes of a project or a sports game. 
  In summary, "post mortem" encompasses both medical examinations and evaluations of events after they have occurred.

  I find myself in alot of times like this.

• Post Mortem

• Moribund

• Memento Mori
  
  Moribund definition
  Literal sense: Moribund means approaching death or in a dying state, used to describe a person, animal, or biological entity that is critically ill or near death. For example, “The patient arrived at the hospital moribund” or “a moribund species affected by habitat loss”.

• Figurative sense: The word is commonly used to describe things that are stagnant, inactive, or on the verge of extinction, such as businesses, industries, organizations, cultural practices, or economies. For instance, “the moribund housing market” or "a moribund newspaper industry" 3. Other examples include a moribund town, political party, or art form, implying a lack of growth, vitality, or productivity.

  Memento Mori definition
  quite simple for this one really, this one little thing holds these other two meanings together like a pillar
  
  a reminder of the inevitability of death

  The way I find myself chained to this is in my dreams every night, each time there is some place where I die, either have it be falling, spikes, knifes, eaten, there is some way I die each time I have a dream. I see that the next day I see and gain that sense and fear and keep trying to avoid it, yet something keeps dragging me towards that. Cutting yourself would be an act of Memento mori, so would a cross and or statue of a dead person. Everything related to hurting the human body or a reminder of a dead person would be Memento Mori, you are constantly reminded and so I am, more than I'd like to be.