Firstly, the 27th of May was a randomly picked day HOWEVER, I did all the calculations and accounted for the days I won't be able to work on it, and everything aligned perfectly.

What I didn't account for is my health.

I want to apologize for the lack of attention towards my own mental health.

Reasoning: I thought that since I don't experience hallucinations anymore, I was fine.

No, I was not fine. I was killing myself slowly - literally.

I clouded my own vision that I was doing everything perfectly fine.

May 24th 0:10am-1:00am

I lost my sanity.

My emotions were unstable. A mix of the following causes made my emotions "fold onto themselves". In simpler terms, I've never felt so lost in my life before - that night I could not recognize myself.

What was the cause of this

5-6.5 hours of sleep daily, constantly physically tired, arguing with myself, lost in feelings, having a headache, stressed and overwhelmed by everything. All that happening 24/7 to me.

After my workouts, it took (still takes) 2-3 additonal days to recover - that's unusually slow. Going to sleep and waking up have become the same thing.

What was reality, dreams, or man-made fiction all fused with one another. When I say that I did not know what I had done already and I had not, I am not being dramatic; I kept on imagining that my past was something completely different to what it actually was.

It's only been 2 days since that event.

I am still very confused about what happened to me on the 24th, and why I can't stop judging myself on every little thing I do wrong.

Future...

I've decided to try to take care of myself and the precious life that I have still have ahead of me.

Sure. I have promised, however, at least I'm being genuine and transparent in my apology and excuses.

Finally,

I apologize and please, take care of yourself and don't forget to Stay Healthy