So today in hass (yall would call it history/geography), we were doing our totally important assessment, but nobody ever behaves in hass because of something to do with them not liking the teacher for some reason (Idfk tbh) so we never get through a lot of learning. Both of our weekly hass lessons are on Tuesday afternoons, in which I’ve already left for therapy every second Tuesday, so I miss out on a lot of information that the teacher doesn’t even try to catch me up on. And like a said before, when I am in class to learn, most of it is interrupted by misbehaving fuckheads. So now I’m here, urgently needing to get an assessment that I don’t even know how to answer done, but of course people are being loud as fuck, which triggers both my autism and Astrokin, so I shut down for most of the lesson. Then I forgot exactly what happened, but I got pissed, and my Astrokin twisted and I started crying and blaming myself for most of the situation. My friend, who sits next to me and is a therian like me, asked me what was wrong so I drew a picture of Twisted Astro in my assessment paper and showed her. She didn’t understand and then asked; “Why’s Astro sad?” Because she doesn’t play Dandy’s World but she knows what Astro looks like because I’ve drawn him at school. I then drew the Fictionkin symbol and an arrow for her, because my sister is Fictionkin and she understands what they are. She understood then, but after second lunch, in which when we have more damn hass, she obviously forgot or something. I was in a shift all fucking lunch, but at least I had calmed down and turned back into Toon Astro. Then of course, my friend tried to help, which only happened to piss me off again and an even stronger Twisted Astro shift came in. I wanted to fucking rip that damn kids limbs off and cry over his corpse in not grief, but guilt. (This kid I’m talking about sits next to me and is the main cause of the shit that goes on during hass lessons). I began to cry again, hiding under my desk and curling my real and phantom arms around my body and sulking like the fucking sook I am. Of course, the annoying group of kids had to lose their shit over it and laugh and yell and get pissed or excited over a crybaby under her desk and sobbing as quietly as she possibly could and trying to suppress the urges to lash out and murder the next person to laugh, leaving their body to bleed out and stain the dark carpet. After two minutes under my desk, Twisted Astro’s guilt kicked in and I wanted to tear out the organs of not only everyone around me, but myself too, because apparently this whole situation is my fault and I’m the one that caused everyone else to be jackasses. I came out from under the desk eventually, and answered what? Two, maybe three if I’m lucky questions? Then not only was there the cacophony around me, but the one in my head, too. How the fuck did I end up having Nothing’s New, Bite Me (the MD fan song), and another song that I forgot, may have been left behind, all playing in my mind alongside the sounds of the stories playing out in my head and my own doubtful thoughts? It was all too confusing and complicated. Not to mention I was sick and no one believed me, despite my cough and fucked nose. Of course I couldn’t use the bathroom as an escape from the chaos, because no one was allowed to go, or so the teacher claimed, even though she let all the dickheads that used it as an excuse to not do work go. And even though it seems little, it only added to my already shit two lessons, I had a single clump of hair that was barely too short to tie up, so it just dangled in my face the whole goddamn time. I was relieved when the bell rang and I could go home. Too bad I had chores and Halloween costumes to sort and fucking homework. Don’t worry now, I’ve got everything sorted and I can chill out for a bit. I’m alright now, I guess. Thanks for reading so far.