Jimmy Curbstomp @JimmyCurbstomp

I think I can best express myself by the following haiku, which I consider the greatest thing I have ever created:

All the dead puppies,
Floating in the septic tank,
They never play fetch

Things I hate, in no particular order and for no particular reason:

People shorter than me,
People taller than me,
Couples who wear matching outfits,
Brand name clothing,
Clothing,
People who crank the volume on their I-pod to maximum,
Large, sweaty shirtless guys at the rec who seem to think that making large grunting noises like a hippopotamus giving birth every time they lift something heavier than a tissue will somehow attract a mate.
Hippies,
Druggies,
Cats,
Opinionated people