Today I don't feel too much like a [[BIG SHOT]]...? The last few days... strangely. Tomorrow will be a better day, I hope. Or in a few hours. There is like still so much crap going on in my head.

[[Okay, here I will put warning, I will discuss something that has bothered me for a lot of my life, please do not bother if you are not old enough and you cannot take this seriously. Some may already know, and I have really tried my best to not screw anything up because of it.]]

Alright, so very unfortunately, I am...

I am hypers*xual. Some think it's a good thing to have but it really isn't. It SUCKS. It's like... a wave of stuff that ropes you into its center. Like... a whirlpool that appears at random intervals when you least expect it. Like when I want to have a regular conversation and suddenly "Hey you gotta be h**ny now!" LIKE I DID NOT NEED THIS I JUST WANTED A REGULAR CONVERSATIOM AND NOW I HAVE TO FORCE MYSELF TO GET RID OF THIS DISGUSTING FEELING FIRST????

It really does pain me. Nearly every freaking day I have to deal with this. I wish. I wish all this was a lie. I do really wish I was lying. But no. I've had this issue since I was a very young girl. I don't know what to do.

The first official spamgestivity, even was a fever dream I had right after having to get rid of this load of crap then passing out right after. Yes, you heard me. It was.

I'm... sorry about some of the spamgestivities and other drawings being a bit too much. I still want to apologize for those. But I... just don't know what to do anymore. It's been so, so long since having to sort whatever this nonsense is. 11. Freaking. Years. I feel ashamed.