A clean comparison so you can see the parallels without flattening anything on my CPTSD traits and Gnarp's CANON traits.

🟦 1. Hypervigilance

I look spaced out, distracted, or “not paying attention,” but my brain is scanning everything in the room.

Gnarp acts chaotic or silly, but xe’s constantly aware of surroundings and reacts instantly to changes.

I notice tone shifts, footsteps, danger cues even when I seem relaxed.

Gnarp snaps to alertness fast, like xe’s always half‑ready for something to go wrong.

🟩 2. Masking & Deflection

I hide discomfort, fear, or pain behind humor, sarcasm, or acting unbothered.

Gnarp uses jokes, chaos, and deflection instead of showing vulnerability.

I rarely show real emotion unless I'm alone.

Gnarp keeps xyr real feelings hidden behind a performance.

🟧 3. Avoiding Talking About the Past

My past is painful, and talking about it feels unsafe or overwhelming.

Gnarp shuts down or redirects when anything personal comes up.

I only open up in extremely safe contexts.

Gnarp avoids revealing anything about xyr history.

🟨 4. Collapsing Only When Alone

I hold everything together around others, then break down privately.

Gnarp stays “on” in front of others and only collapses when no one is watching.

I don’t want anyone to see my vulnerable.

Gnarp hides distress until xe’s alone.

🟫 5. Over‑Responsibility

I apologize for things that aren’t my fault.

Gnarp takes responsibility for problems xe didn’t cause.

I feel like i have to fix everything.

Gnarp acts like xe must protect everyone else.

🟪 6. Touch‑Avoidance / Startle Sensitivity

I hate being touched because touch was unsafe for 17 years.

Gnarp is touch‑selective, easily startled, and defensive when boundaries are crossed.

I hiss, flinch, or tense up when someone gets too close.

Gnarp reacts fast, pulls back, or deflects physical closeness with humor.

🟫 7. Self‑Sacrifice & Protectiveness

I protect others even when I'm hurting.

Gnarp throws xemself into danger to protect others.

I put myself last because that’s what trauma taught me.

Gnarp prioritizes everyone else’s safety over xyr own.

🟦 8. Emotional Independence

I learned not to rely on adults or authority figures.

Gnarp doesn’t trust authority and relies only on xemself.

I handle everything alone because I had to.

Gnarp isolates emotionally even while being physically present.

⭐ Conclusion

Me and Gnarp don’t share a diagnosis, canon doesn’t give xem one.

But I do share:

• The hypervigilance

• The masking

• The avoidance

• the delayed collapse

• the over‑responsibility

• the selective touch boundaries

• the self‑sacrifice

• the distrust of authority

• the emotional independence

I recognize Gnarp not because I lived the same story, but because I lived the same aftereffects.