--MAIN STORY FLASHBACKS--

Basically, me and Charmzy used to be BFFs back then in 2023 (Or early 2024).

After some weeks and months of friendship, we ended up having arguments, a lot of them later, and each time one happened, things kept getting worse and worse, til one day, some kind of "war" happened.

It WAS pretty devastating and difficult in those times stuff like that happened, it was just too much.

Her, her fans, me, my fans, and everyone involved was left with remorse, I don't really want to recap every detail, It was indeed a bit traumatic, and since those days, I changed quite much.

On past dramas, I used to say "I can't change", well, it seems that contradicted myself.

But now you may be asking, "What about her?"

Well... I have some stuff that I have hid for weeks from everyone.

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--DEEPER ICEBERG FLASHBACKS--

Seriously, no jokes, almost every time I'm just relaxing, I ended up getting a flashback of her and my past, which sometimes hurts me and makes me want to cry, It's hard to forget.

I feel like a huge bully because of what I've said before, even though we almost ruined each other's careers, I gave her a genuine apology accepting, I didn't feel mad at her, I was just feeling, you know, guilty, I really am unfortunately a person that is a little insensitive and sucks at motivating others, and nowadays just self-deprecates.

--THE EMOTIONAL FLASHBACKS--

There are so many sources of flashbacks everywhere, over the Internet, comments, accounts, files in my PC, etc.

I will try to count all the flashbacks I've got this year, if it's not accurate, and you were there during the dramas, you can help me out on guessing more possible flashbacks.

1. ROBLOX Days

Basically, I used to play ROBLOX with her quite a lot, however, after we had arguments, we played less due to grudges, I admit, I was weird in ROBLOX, and that made her uncomfortable at some times,

As of today (4/10/2025), I was cleaning my PC files, then found a ROBLOX "Videos" folder, I checked them, there's some ROBLOX stuff there like expected, however, some videos are me and her playing a ROBLOX Yandere Simulator-based game, and this is the latest flashback I got for now, that flashback just brought guiltiness, not depression, though.

2. Friendship Days

After and before her last apology, I didn't block her, that would feel cruel, I kept her unblocked on my ALT (This account) til present.

The main thing in this part is, Game Jolt's Algorithm randomly brings up some of her posts sometimes, which makes me feel extra guilt and sometimes depression, despair.

Sometimes people randomly comment on posts that had me and her as friends still, it just hurts my feelings, those people are not aware of the tragic past, it's not their fault, though.

Basically, if you search up @LeashedSkies or @LeashedExperiments , there's always a result related to her, I made her popular and she made me popular, not many people talked to me without her.

Our humor and “banter” felt a little bit... unique?

It was all about drugs(Insanity) and being exaggeratedly silly, but nowadays, my humor got REALLY dark, and I accidentally let it out to people who aren't used to it, which is, well, not really “awesome sauce” of me, my humor is as broken as my feelings every time I get a flashback.

And the fact Game Jolt will always use your current profile picture feels like Game Jolt itself is poking at me "It's you, no, it WAS you, this is not YOU", which gives a little agony.

She was also there when I killed off my OC and made t into a girl due to being non-binary (Now Leah is a persona, and Leashy is Mou/Jayden (That's me)'s hypothetical cold side), which was a moment not all my fans witnessed, quite many did, but not all.

And as you noticed, I used to have WAY more likes when we were a "Silly Duo", not anymore, I have 5-20 likes now, mostly with good night posts, which really sucks cause I wanted main content to be noticed, but, this is a bit off-topic, it's about her and my traumas, not my career, FUCK my career honestly, I cared about it too much, I still care about it and will care about it, but, I'm aware I might not be here forever so, It's kind of futile of me.

I have memory issues since mid 2024, please forgive me if I miss out any part here, This post does not attack, offend, or harm anybody, I'd say this is a homage, whatever floats my followers' boat..?

THE END.

--EXTRAS--

Extra 1:

I am still in her community, but, I never posted anymore because it would feel Wrong, Awkward, and could spark more dramas, if you, Lana/Sabrina/Charmzy sees this, you have all right to ban me out of your community if you still hate me or don't want me associated at even one bit.

Extra 2:

Now what about we invent words for easier reading?

This is an FSH (Former, Silly humor), I really just wanted to say this, I appreciate and miss the old humor, It's been a while nothing funny or silly happened, It's just me getting too serious nowadays, I'm more serious than my own mother now (I'm not joking, once again, my mother loves making scandals... Damn Tsundere ass mother).

Extra 3: I didn't forget some specific promises, etc, but, they're too long ago I can't do them anymore or just feel like not doing them, I once had a bet with her that if I lost it, I would listen to a ENTIIIIRE Billie Eilish song, I actually never listened to Billie properly, only two times.

Extra-Extra 3: In my school, there had PC Exams stuff which had Billie Eilish-themed questions, which happened in days I still was with her, that felt a little weird, but, hey, at least I had an excuse to read song lyrics during class

Extra 4: We used to share an account back then, however, due to the arguments, we split ways and the account was abandoned.

She was considered the coolest in that account due she gained most popularity there than me, even though, I did (and still might) have more followers than her, I might at some point get less than her as I keep constantly losing followers nowadays, but yeah.

The account was:

@SillyGang

There had no cool Billie Eilish x Eminem collaboration banner, so I made a funny one myself, making them wider to fit the screen, adding silly text, and yeah, pretty much it, also the stare wasn't intentional, don't punt on me, we even had talking indicators.

I admit it, I was a little protective of her in those days, cared about her being in danger or not, cared enough to make that post in the account, as there had personal or sensitive information in Direct Messages, like, stuff meant for one to see, and other not, either due lack of interest, or hatred for specific content, etc.

And oh, dear god, Extra 4 is so long that I had to even write this additional comment about it here.

Extra 5 (Really, Mou, REALLY?):
Yeah, I don't have much to say anymore, just wanted to show what I've been hiding before, like, sometimes even when I'm alone I randomly get flashbacks, surprisingly, I only got one or two flashbacks today even when writing all this.

THANKS FOR READING, THIS POST TOOK WAY TOO LONG.