4 months ago

"will someone ever miss me if i was gone?"

"Why keep trying?" "Whats the point of keep going?"

I know, its hard not to overthink, with the millions of pessimist thoughts, telling you horrible things.

But dont let ur fight spirit die without even starting.


Yes, its valid to cry. Your gender doesnt says anything, just because youre a guy or a girl doesnt mean youre perfect glass that wont ever be broken into pieces, because everyone will crack sometime in life, and we'll pick up the small pieces and try to build ourselves again.

Its too much to think, family, social media, your inner demons. Its hard, yes, i know, i know you may think youre ugly, youre useless but none of thats true, because youre a living miracle, every second you choose to live it only angers your demon, thats why it becomes louder and peskier, but trust me, this ache is worth having because theres nothing more beautiful then being proud of being a fighter, because we're all are. To live is a choice not everyone can accept, and its not something so simple you can just kill yourself to just stop, because sure, you can, but do you know the impact of your loss? Do you know what you could do? Your potential? Because what i see in you is a whole life of joy and ups and downs, dont mistake potential with expectation, because no, im not tryna put pressure, all i want for you is to see how important you are, but you need a north, and from personal experience, i can tell you a whole lot, but of one thing im certain, you are not the worst, because there has been way worse. Have you ever met someone narcisist? Such ignorance is sorta admirable, isnt it? To just think about themselves, and yet youre not like that, so yes, youre not the worst person. Youre are worthy of living and receiving love, and if you dont see the love and care in my words, please say so, because all i write is to help you heal these scars this freaking horrible screaming voices have made you do. If you ever think for once second that no one loves you, your family, or anyone, know that i do, that other people do and you might not even know, and whatever you may tell yourself, dont let these nasty voices convince yourself that you dont deserve love, or that youre ugly, stupid or whatever else it might seem believable, because yes your grace transcends the looks, its truly admirable to see how your persist, and i want and need you to keep going, for your family, win your inner fight, for your friends, dont let this be only a reminder of everything youve did wrong, but a reminder of your true strenght, because no instagram 'model' life can be compared to yours.

Please be kind to yourself, try to find some self love.

How, you ask me, if youre dying a bit more every day?

Meditate, read a book, find the joy in the little things, and i know its not easy, i took a long time myself to find the real meaning, but you gotta keep trying until you finally see the point of life, because life's only ugly for the ones that arent looking at it correctly, because we're got the sunset, birds, capybaras, and if you say all of that isn't enough, its because youre truly blind to see the true beauty of life, because its deeper than anything on the surface for you to understand, thats why its so easy to commit suicide but hard to keep living, so do yourself a favor, and release all the pent-up feelings in cries, sleep, anything you find that puts you to ease, but please, dont, even for a second, think about doing it, because you dont know how much you'll break hearts, which you could instead try to get closer and build your relationship. Always remember to be kind to people, to be brave to actually tell someone you trust your inner fight because keeping everything to yourself will only get you down in the stairs of life, and i want you see on the highest step on the stairs, someplace way further than me, that i'll be able to see that i was able to truly help unblind you. If youre religious, pray to your god, pratice your religion and hug something that brings you comfort, but dont fear telling others the truth, in asking others if they wanna talk with you about (x) stuff, because its rare to find true friendship in here, and if youre really wanna survive, you gotta start interacting, as its one of the things we cant life without, human interaction.

I write a lot, but its for your own good. If i want i can always be here tryna to lift you off this cold, and i want to see you fly to the sky with my help, going to far off into your success, i dont want to see you come to an abrupt fall of tragedy.


With love and care, please treat your life with seriousness, because once you decide to kill yourself, youre not gonna be able to come back, and i wanna see you living long and healthily.



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