Samus Aran Now Has A Proper Face! We Deeply Apologize For Her Previously Looking Like Slenderwoman, And As Soon As We Can Replace Her Creepy Old Model With This Beautiful New One, We Shall Update The Story Teaser As Well. Thank You For Understanding.

If the latest Nintendo rumours are anything by which to go, which — let's face it — they're not, these new plans still shan't put JadeEmatic behind The Switch's successor!

That's right, "The JadeEmatic is coming! BEFORE, the Nintendo ® Switch™ successor!

Here it is, the Xbox Trailer no one expected.

JadeJohnson:

Ever since the announcement of The PS Vita, I've almost strictly been a Nintendo®-collector. So imagine my excitement when I discover that Sony® may have an early PSP™2 handheld in development!

Yes, that is my real PSP™ 3000′ Silver Model!

Out with the old, In with the new!

Have you noticed that some of our games now come in proper "boxes?" Just like the ones you might see on the Nintendo® Switch™ shelves at your local game-store?

Please comment which of our games should receive the box treatment next!

Although not yet shown here, racing-Games with proper steering-controls are coming to JadeEmatic!

Hoping ya'll are ready to funk right now! If you want the testers key, DM me. :D

How The New BradCoWaiian Dreams Will Run On A Dell Or HP Laptop From 2018 Or Earlier:

For reference, we recommend running this game on an MSI or ASUS laptop from 2022 or later, with either an NVIDIA GeForce RTX 3080 or an AMD Ryzen 9 9950 GPU.

⚠️RTX4090🔥