Give me a plausible reason for all of these characters not being playable in Smash, now.

Every time when I play smash, this happens

I made the melee intro but with me and my friends (I didn't copy the intro one for one, cause they would be kind of boring, but I did take the original intro as inspiration)

Smash Ultimate menu recreation

Now with C-stick!

Super Enda!

"Super Smash Bros Melee is a classic fighting game with a high skill ceiling in competitive play"

My ass with the C-stick:

super smash bros ultimate if it was good:

damn i see a claprose in my posts

Uhm.... is that galeem? Should we worry? ( not my art )