Can somebody please translate this into English?

Little quickie I did.

"Don't blame me, peg the kid with the keyboard!"

Dibujitos que había hecho en la escuela

Install Now

✨Human ENA ✨

I'LL HAVE SOMEONE'S ASS FOR DINNER!!!!

Hi there, care to sign my petition?

I was testing an ibis paint brush that I had in my gallery.

Also with the change of cell phone, my drawings and things from ibis paint were lost and I'm lazy to recover them lol

My dad sent this to me yesterday. It is now my phone wallpaper.