Freeeeee birrrrrrd yeaahh (insert guitar riff here)

My fatass saw a small assortment of chocolates on the counter of my humble abode, immediately scarfed down one without a semblance of a second thought, and read the microscopic label stating it was alcoholic. Whoopsies.

Landed on the wrong exoplanet

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Minor "rebranding" to immortalize my affinity for something I would probably be very thoroughly bullied for liking if I were open about it in person! I love!

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Me venting my eternal and insatiable yearning for cuddles to my friends for absolutely no reason be like

normal day in the argonne

All I see is white at the end

Making fun of the blobfish because it looks ugly after being pulled rapidly out from under tons of water pressure would be like making fun of a human for what they look like after being beaten and burned to near death.

Leave my boi alone ):