Can somebody please translate this into English?

Install Now

I look up LEGO Batman, and what do I see?

THIS.

MASTAHPEECE.

hey guys its my birthday

also srry for online too long e

Remastered Minecraft skin.

My dad sent this to me yesterday. It is now my phone wallpaper.

I'LL HAVE SOMEONE'S ASS FOR DINNER!!!!

Hi there, care to sign my petition?

"Don't blame me, peg the kid with the keyboard!"

Reject UwUdozer, return to Dogezer.