Hi there, care to sign my petition?

Can somebody please translate this into English?

"Don't blame me, peg the kid with the keyboard!"

I'LL HAVE SOMEONE'S ASS FOR DINNER!!!!

Reject UwUdozer, return to Dogezer.

I look up LEGO Batman, and what do I see?

THIS.

MASTAHPEECE.

Remastered Minecraft skin.

My dad sent this to me yesterday. It is now my phone wallpaper.

Made this in an AI meme generator accidentally. No keywords, nothing.

Little quickie I did.