"Don't blame me, peg the kid with the keyboard!"

Can somebody please translate this into English?

Reject UwUdozer, return to Dogezer.

Install Now

Hi there, care to sign my petition?

Little quickie I did.

Remastered Minecraft skin.

I look up LEGO Batman, and what do I see?

THIS.

MASTAHPEECE.

My dad sent this to me yesterday. It is now my phone wallpaper.

I'LL HAVE SOMEONE'S ASS FOR DINNER!!!!