Can somebody please translate this into English?

Install Now

Little quickie I did.

Hi there, care to sign my petition?

Reject UwUdozer, return to Dogezer.

I'LL HAVE SOMEONE'S ASS FOR DINNER!!!!

My dad sent this to me yesterday. It is now my phone wallpaper.

"Don't blame me, peg the kid with the keyboard!"

Remastered Minecraft skin.

I look up LEGO Batman, and what do I see?

THIS.

MASTAHPEECE.