Can somebody please translate this into English?

My dad sent this to me yesterday. It is now my phone wallpaper.

Little quickie I did.

I look up LEGO Batman, and what do I see?

THIS.

MASTAHPEECE.

Remastered Minecraft skin.

"Don't blame me, peg the kid with the keyboard!"

Reject UwUdozer, return to Dogezer.

Hi there, care to sign my petition?

I'LL HAVE SOMEONE'S ASS FOR DINNER!!!!

Install Now